When you stare at your reflection

When you stare at your reflection
Its just you looking back
Take a moment and wonder
At the miracle that is life

When you stare at your reflection
Its like an inner soul inspection
Look yourself up and down
Smile don’t frown
Treat yourself with affection
Regardless of your complexion
Be good to yourself
And every now and then
For your own protection
Be happy with that person in your own unique reflection

Full Irish Breakfast Bitch

Feed me, feed me now
I’m fucking starving you don’t know how
Three sausages not fucking two
Two rashers of bacon not a few
Pudding white and pudding black
Two fried eggs cause I’ve been smoking crack
Don’t look at me as a man of little means
Flash that plate up with Bachelor’s beans
Homemade soda or toast for the soakage
The ladies in town come to me for the pokeage
Assemble the troops quickly bitch
As I have the urge to scutter
Fry the whole fucking lot in creamery butter